#64: ‘She Dares To Say’ Season 3 round-up No. 4
Revisiting all the ‘What The Notches Said’ interviews
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‘She Dares To Say’ is now wrapping up its third season, which began in October 2023. The rotating schedule has included the following content strands:
‘Pleasure Principles with Almaz Ohene’ column for Female Health & Fertility magazine
My column appears in the digital magazine each issue (now released quarterly) and I also publish it in full via ‘She Dares To Say’.
‘Authenticity Arena’ sexuality survey interviews
Where I gently encourage members of the public to open up about their views and personal experiences of sex. Interviews are formatted as verbatim text transcripts and I also include the audio recordings (with any identifying personal information bleeped out). Written answers that interviewees gave in response to my sexuality survey are also published in paywalled ‘POSTSCRIPT’ posts. To gain access to these posts upgrade to paid.
‘Considering My Crushes’ essays
Where I write about my celebrity/public eye/fictional crushes along with imagery. A couple of these essays are partially paywalled. To read essays in full, upgrade to paid. And, some of these posts are guest essays by writers in my community.
‘What The Notches Said’ interviews
Where I reach out to various people from my sexual past and ask them to answer quick-fire questions about where they were at in life when we dated/hooked-up and how their views/situation have changed in the intervening years. Some extra text and audio extracts from the especially entertaining parts of the conversation are also published in paywalled ‘POSTSCRIPT’ posts. To gain access to these posts upgrade to paid.
This post will round up all of the ‘What The Notches Said’ interviews.
Previous posts:
‘Z’ is a man with whom I had a beautiful, yet fraught love affair in 2024. ‘Z’ had already explained a little about what his sexual and romantic life looked like – he was in a civil partnership with a woman with whom he’d recently opened things up. But I was surprised when he said he lived in a big University town in the south of England. Turned out, though, that he was often in Manchester to visit family. Phew; the logistics didn’t seem impossible. We fell in love, but sadly, it didn’t work out.
I shared more verbatim material from the end of our conversation, where ‘Z’ talks about the issues that come with wanting kids, but being in multiple relationships. Paywalled: To gain access to this post upgrade to paid.
‘Q’ and I met in the Summer of 2023, at a (non-sex) sex event mixer. There was a series of ice-breakers where guests had to go talk to folks that they didn’t know. ‘Q’ and I chatted and checked each other out for x-number of minutes until it was time for us all to rotate. ‘Q’ took my number as I was super intrigued when he told me he had just begun heading up a collective of Manchester sensuality enthusiasts that had started running their own play party extravaganzas.
I shared some extra text and audio extracts from the especially entertaining part of the conversation, where ‘Q’ revealed how great a surprise it was when he discovered the strings of beads I wear at my waist when making out on our first date. Paywalled: To gain access to this post upgrade to paid.
‘T’ was an older guy (in a long line of older guys, haha) who I dated the year I turned 30 in 2019. I remembered that we had a really lovely time going on a few dates, after meeting in a bar after a classical music concert. And that his openness about his relationship status back then – he was dating other people after recently opening up his marriage – might mean he’d be up for chatting to me. I reached out and he agreed.
I shared some extra text and audio extracts from the end of the conversation between ‘T’ and I, as some interesting material came up around ‘T’s living and co-parenting arrangements. Paywalled: To gain access to this post upgrade to paid.
Back in 2016, ‘V’s place was just a short walk away from mine, so it was a very convenient set-up for us both. But after some months, ‘V’ moved to the other end of London, to an area where there wasn’t much happening. So, it just wasn’t convenient for me to undertake a 90-minute schlep to see him, especially since staying over would have made my morning commute to work horrendous (and I also didn’t have any other friends living around there to hang out with either). Needless to say, things fizzled out almost immediately. And that was that. Until…
‘W’ is a woman with whom I’ve only shared a couple of experiences, but they were so connected and intense that we both speak of them in superlatives. We were initially introduced to each other in passing at a sex event in early 2020, and linked up for the first time just as Covid-19 started showing up in London. And then all the lockdowns happened, so we didn’t see each other again for a couple of years, by which time I’d actually moved out of London, but then I randomly bumped into her while I was down for a visit one time.
I shared more verbatim material from the end of our conversation, as some interesting nuggets came out as we chatted surrounding the (in)ability of people to communicate their sexual desires and boundaries. Paywalled: To gain access to this post upgrade to paid.
‘Y’ and I dated non-monogamously for around 18 months some years ago, when I was 28 and ‘Y’ was 47, after having matched on dating app Feeld. And we have remained firm friends ever since. We’re still in regular contact via WhatsApp and also have long, meandering phone calls, which I love. We actually met up to catch up in person for the first time since the pre-covid times, about a week before we had the online interview chat, and we spent a lot of time beaming at each other across the table. Cute, right.
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I’m Almaz Ohene, a Creative Copywriter, Freelance Journalist and Accidental Sexpert.
Watch my showreel highlighting the work I’ve been doing within the intimacy pleasure, intimacy and sex ed sectors.
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This content is not behind a paywall, but since it takes time to create and upload each piece, do please consider becoming a paid subscriber of ‘She Dares to Say’ (especially if this project is something that you value, and you have the means to do so). A paid subscription gets you bonus posts each month and unrestricted access to the full archive of this newsletter. A paid subscription is either billed monthly at £3.79 or annually at £34.99.
If you would prefer to make a one-off donation, feel free to send a contribution via PayPal.
You can also show your enjoyment without spending £££, by liking, commenting, restacking via Notes or just generally sharing 😃